This Is The

SAFEST

Place To Be

An OPAQUE Production

Your everyday band and their struggle for sucess


"This Is The SAFEST Place To Be...", a documentary video on the young group, 'Mindless Enthusiasms', your average teenage band. Filmed by myself, Khairil M. Bahar, "This..." shows the viewers exactly what young bands go through, not in trying to get a record deal, not in trying to get into a major gig, but to play at the school carnival. The band, originally intent on playing five songs, we're reduced to playing one, with Whitefield school saying that their wasn't enough play time for them to do more than one song.The song in mention, was Greenday's "When I Come Around"...

How I Made 'This Is The Safest Place To Be...'
The Band itself, 'Mindless Enthusiasms'
Quotes from 'This is the SAFEST place to be...'

The Making of 'This is the Safest Place To Be...'

Part one : The Equipment
Tied to my balls by a shoestring budget, I simply used a Panasonic VHS-C camcorder belonging to my mother. For the actual performance, I used a tripod, which was pretty pointless because I was in a crap position. I wanted to film directly infront, but the band wanted me at an angle. My position meant more of the crowd would be heard than the music. For editing, a simple 1979 Panasonic VHS video recorder, and for titling, my trusty Amiga 500+ and Scala 5000.
To me, the only thing I wish I had to add to this was a gun microphone and a better camcorder. If possible, I would have used a better VHS recorder with audio dub, a feature I have without.

Part two : Filming
For the main filming, I used handheld camera work the whole way except for the main performance. I wanted it to give this rough look which is evident in the band. I knew the video quality wouldn't be first rate, but that also adds to its supreme roughness. I would have loved to film this in super-8mm film. What I did was to get the band not only playing their songs, but being as interesting as possible. This is the glory of the video camera. Everybody loves to act stupid infront of it. An easy way to sum up this video would be 'grunge & tomfoolery'. What I knew I had to film mas the performances, so what I recorded was the songs they never managed to play in the end, and their final performance, ending with an earth shattering run of carnage, as they jumped around with their guitars, banging the drums furiously and making the most of their one song gig. The main interview, filmed on a bench in the carnival an hour beforehand, is increadibly amusing in a "I-want-to-be-Nirvana" way, using the American accents they never had but brought into full use in this docu-epic. Andi talks of the band, the three fans, and their contract for 50. Nasir is the next Kurt Hammond, he doesn't want to talk. Sidiq says his immortal lines, "Kill 'em all, I say!" and Ryan, the zanniest of the quadrapeds, talks of Metallica camp fires, camp fire songs, their pop group status (explained later in 'key scenes'), becoming the teacher of kung fu and puts on the most American accent of the four.
Capturing these amusing anecdotes, I also managed to film a load of crap which is fun to watch personally, but no use for the general public. Must edit out. On the way I managed to film some black guys break dancing and loving rock n' roll. However, the most increadibly tom foolish of the tomfoolery scenes has to be the carnage and mayhem in the dance hall. What they were supposed to do: clear up the equipment. What they did: mess up the equipment, bang the drums, dance around and jump about, slide on the floor and throw the drop mat about. Masterpiece.

Part three : Editing
For editing, I first watched all the footage and wrote down every single scene. I then rearanged them on paper for a rough layout, then simply recorded the bits in their order. One method of editing which I brought into it is repeating scenes, in homage of Max Headroom, which I later used more often in other videos. For example, for Sidiq's "Kill 'em all" line, since that's the one word he always says, I repeated it, over and over again...
For the titles' music, I used the band playing "About A Girl" at a practise outside, and for the end credits, I used Green Day's "When I Come Around". One thing that happened mid-editing was one of the tapes losing some quality, making the film look dodgy from time to time. Ah, well, who gives.

Mindless Enthusiasms

ANDI on rhythm guitar/lead vocals...

"We are now... so exhaustered...!"

NASIR on lead guitar...

"Aku nak balik, lah, balik rumah nak berak, balik rumah lagi baik, aku dah sakit perut ni...!"
(Translated - I wanna go home, go home and take a shit, going home is much better, I have a bad stomach ache...!

SIDIQ on bass guitar...

"Kill 'em ALL!!!!"

RYAN on drums and percussions...

"I would like to state some views upon the traffic situation...fuck it, man."


Famous quotes from "This Is The SAFEST Place To Be..."

"I fucked up, I'm afraid..." - Andi

"I'm Kurt Hammond, I don't want to talk." - Nasir

"Kill 'em all, I say!" - Sidiq

"Fuck it, man!" - Ryan

"You guys are FUCKED up!" - Khairil (cut from video)

"Andi fucked up, man!" - Sami

"Yeah...! Mr. Bon Jovi...(gets tackled by guy in red)" - Breakdancing guy

"Fuck you! (Dun dun dun) Fuck you! (Dun dun dun) Fuck you! (Dun dun dun) Fuck you!..." - Mindless Enthusiasms

"I hear were going to get a contract after this for... 50..." - Andi

ANDI - "May I have some of your cherry coke?"
RYAN - "Yes you... oh, I'm sorry you may not for this is not cherry coke, its cherryade."

"Sixty TV, sixtiestees, sixties tee, sixties whatever, 60's TV, cut out." - Sidiq

"(Holding missing plectrum before camera) Oooooh... ooohhh...!" - Nasir

"Guru, guru, guru, guru, hahaha...aaah!! haa!" - Mindless Enthusiasms

"(Holding the bass guitar like a cello)I like to play the double bass..." - Andi

"(Holding bass guitar as violin and using drumstick as violin stick)I am Vanessa... Vanessa..." - Nasir

"Party on, Wayne!" - Sidiq

"Ah oh!!" - Ryan, singing back up on 60's TV

"Nirvana, Nirvana, already dead, already dead, Kurt Cobain, Kurt Cobain, Cicak kobeng (geko lizard), Cicak kobeng..." - Mindless Enthusiasms

"We are now, so exhaustered... ('exhaustered' pronounced as spelled)" - Andi

"What A-minor? What fucking A-minor?" - Nasir

ANDI - "Did you have a good time? Did you have a good time, man? I know I had it, man..."
SIDIQ - "Who started it, man?"
ANDI - "Exactly, man. The bassist, started it all, even though he made a lot of mistakes, man, he started it all, he's the best, man...(fake sobs)"

"I am the teacher of kung fu! (hands wrong way round inside shirt)" - Ryan

"(Drinks) I am now ready...BURP!!!!" - Andi

"Whitefield carnival, yah yah, yah yah yah, yah yah, one time, two time, three time, four time, six time..." -Mindless Enthusiasms on another rap band

"(Very long burp)...YES!!!" - Nasir

"Lome lome, I like to play drums, lome lome, I like to play drums, lome lome, na na na na, na na na na, lome lome! Lome lome lome lome..." - Mindless Enthusiasms


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